CHEATING AND THE INTERNET
June 18, 2007I am conducting a survey for a research paper. If you are interested in participating please answer the questions listed below.
Sex –
Age –
Relationship Status –
Please answer the following questions honestly. Explain your answers if you think it needs more than a yes or no. Would you answers change if you were just BF/GF?, engaged? Married?
When it comes to being in a relationship what is your definition of cheating?
Do you think flirting in person is cheating?
Do you think flirtatious talk over the internet is cheating?
Would it be cheating if your significant other had a profile on a networking site and listed their status as single?
Do you consider cyber sex cheating?
Do you consider exchanging sexy photos cheating?
What about exchanging nude photos via email or cell phone?
Would it be cheating if your significant other watch someone strip on a webcam?
Would it be cheating if your significant other watch please themselves on a webcam?
How would it change if it was someone they knew? Friend, coworker, acquaintance?
Is exchanging sexua1 worded emails or texts cheating?
Is sharing experiences and fantasies online cheating?
Is having a profile on a dating site cheating?
Is looking at internet porn cheating?
Sex: M
Age: 37
Status: married
When it comes to being in a relationship what is your definition of cheating?
- Cheating is getting into a romantic or erotic relationship (of any duration) with someone other than your spouse/partner/significant other, without that person’s consent.
Do you think flirting in person is cheating?
- No, not as long as there is no attempt to carry it further.
Do you think flirtatious talk over the internet is cheating?
- No, however (ironically) the boundaries that prevent one from “carrying it further” are blurrier online. That’s because in this highly anonymous context there is far less possibility of flirtation leading to actual, real-world sexual contact.
Would it be cheating if your significant other had a profile on a networking site and listed their status as single?
- By itself, no. There could be innocent, or at least relatively innocuous, reasons for doing this.
Do you consider cyber sex cheating?
- Ask my wife. Seriously? It’s a tough call. There’s no actual contact, it’s presumably anonymous and there’s presumably no chance of meeting the person on the other end. This is really sharing an erotic fantasy — I’m not sure if that’s necessarily cheating. On the other hand, many people would argue that sharing sexual intimacy with someone by any means of communication is cheating. As with many of these questions, the deciding factor depends on what boundaries you and your significant other have set.
Do you consider exchanging sexy photos cheating?
- This seems to cross a line. It violates the wall of anonymity, and establishes a personal erotic relationship between two people (or more). Exchanging photos seems to imply a genuine desire to act.
What about exchanging nude photos via email or cell phone?
- Same as above, I think.
Would it be cheating if your significant other watch someone strip on a webcam?
- Just watching, prolly not.
Would it be cheating if your significant other watch please themselves on a webcam?
- Same as above.
How would it change if it was someone they knew? Friend, coworker, acquaintance?
- This would be significantly different than watching someone anonymous, since there’s a real chance of extending this to real-world contact.
Is exchanging sexua1 worded emails or texts cheating?
- Again, it depends on whether this is with a stranger or acquaintance.
Is sharing experiences and fantasies online cheating?
- Same as above.
Is having a profile on a dating site cheating?
- I think going out on a date with someone you met on a dating site is cheating. But simply having the profile there probably doesn’t fully cross that line. I think you have to act on it. An innocent explanation might be that someone is simply curious what types of people he/she might attract.
Is looking at internet porn cheating?
- No more so than looking at porn in magazines, movies or anywhere else. Which is to say, no, it’s not cheating. But it may be outside the boundaries that are acceptable to your significant other.
Sex – F
Age –25
Relationship Status –Single
Please answer the following questions honestly. Explain your answers if you think it needs more than a yes or no. Would you answers change if you were just BF/GF?, engaged? Married?
When it comes to being in a relationship what is your definition of cheating?
Cheating is breaking boundries that have been agreed upon by both people in the relationship. If no boundries have been established, it is still possoble to be cheating if one person or the other doesn’t find your actions acceptable.
Do you think flirting in person is cheating? yes
Do you think flirtatious talk over the internet is cheating? most of the time yes, unless you have agreed that flirting is ok
Would it be cheating if your significant other had a profile on a networking site and listed their status as single? i
t’s dishonest, but not cheating really
Do you consider cyber sex cheating? not unless it’s with someone you know
Do you consider exchanging sexy photos cheating? no
What about exchanging nude photos via email or cell phone? yes
Would it be cheating if your significant other watch someone strip on a webcam? yes
Would it be cheating if your significant other watch someone please themselves on a webcam? not unless it’s snomeone they know
How would it change if it was someone they knew? Friend, coworker, acquaintance? any of those would make it more upsetting, but if it never went any further than the internet, it would be forgiveable
Is exchanging sexua1 worded emails or texts cheating? again, only if he knew the person
Is sharing experiences and fantasies online cheating? no
Is having a profile on a dating site cheating?yes
Is looking at internet porn cheating?no
I think that if any of these encounters involve real people you know, they are more maddening than if they don’t, but if no physical or spoken contact is made, it’s prpbably forgiveable.
Sex – J
Age – 28
Relationship Status – dating
When it comes to being in a relationship what is your definition of cheating? A sexual relationship with someone other then your significant other without their prior knowledge of your actions.
Do you think flirting in person is cheating? no
Do you think flirtatious talk over the internet is cheating? no
Would it be cheating if your significant other had a profile on a networking site and listed their status as single? it would depend on what they would be using the site for. If it would be to make contacts and friends, then its not cheating, but if they were using their listed single status to be permiscuis, then yes, that would be cheating.
Do you consider cyber sex cheating? pathethic, but no
Do you consider exchanging sexy photos cheating? this would be pushing the lines, but no.
What about exchanging nude photos via email or cell phone? again, toeing the line, but no
Would it be cheating if your significant other watch someone strip on a webcam? no
Would it be cheating if your significant other watch please themselves on a webcam? possibly disturbing, but no
How would it change if it was someone they knew? Friend, coworker, acquaintance? This would again depend of what the purpose is. If its not taken any further, I dont see the harm in it.
Is exchanging sexua1 worded emails or texts cheating? if it is casual and stays plutonic, then no.
Is sharing experiences and fantasies online cheating? once again, kinda pathethic, but no.
Is having a profile on a dating site cheating? nah
Is looking at internet porn cheating? no
Sex – F
Age – 22
Relationship Status – Single
Please answer the following questions honestly. Explain your answers if you think it needs more than a yes or no. Would you answers change if you were just BF/GF?, engaged? Married?
When it comes to being in a relationship what is your definition of cheating?
A sexual relationship with someone who is not your significant other. Also, to an extent, engaging in an emotionally intimate relationship with someone other than your significant other, which does not need to be sexual in nature at all.
Do you think flirting in person is cheating?
It depends on the relationship. I think you can flirt with someone without being sexual or romantically interested at all, and that in some cases, flirting may be in a joking matter, so it might indicate a closer friendship. It’s when the flirtation is taken further that it may constitute cheating.
Do you think flirtatious talk over the internet is cheating?
Again, as with the above answer, it depends on the relationship. However, it is easier to misinterpret language over the Internet, so one of the people involved might take it more serious than the flirtation actually is.
Would it be cheating if your significant other had a profile on a networking site and listed their status as single?
If they are using the site to social network (i.e., meet other people), then it wouldn’t be cheating so much as it is dishonest. Couples need to communicate; if the status didn’t change, then it might be suspicious.
Do you consider cyber sex cheating?
Toes the line. There’s no contact, but at the same time, it’s a betrayal of trust, which is at the core of cheating.
Do you consider exchanging sexy photos cheating?
It’s one thing if you’re showing your best friend, trying to decide what would be good to wear for your date or something. However, if it’s not the best friend, but with someone who is not your significant other, yes. If you feel the need to exchange sexy photos, reconsider why you’re in a relationship to begin with.
What about exchanging nude photos via email or cell phone?
Yes. Reconsider why you’re in the relationship if you’re exchanging nude photos with someone else.
Would it be cheating if your significant other watch someone strip on a webcam?
As long as he/she is not meeting up with the stripper later, no.
Would it be cheating if your significant other watch please themselves on a webcam?
Not unless it’s someone they know.
How would it change if it was someone they knew? Friend, coworker, acquaintance?
It’s cheating. It’s boundaries. If it’s a stripper who has a webcam whom they never met before, then it’s kinda understandable. If it’s someone they know, I think it’d be more uncomfortable when they’re in person again, for everyone involved.
Is exchanging sexua1 worded emails or texts cheating?
If it’s not your significant other, yes
Is sharing experiences and fantasies online cheating?
No
Is having a profile on a dating site cheating?
If you’re in a committed relationship with someone & still have an active online dating profile, yes (because why would you still be looking?)
Is looking at internet porn cheating?
No.